Torch - Spring 2018

Grade 11 student Quinn Danniels speaks at Prayers about the resilience of her cousin, who became a Paralympic athlete after an accident left him paralyzed.

perfectionist is risk-reluctant and failure-averse. In striving to be perfect, she cannot tolerate any setbacks, errors or disappointments. Ironically, it’s this very intolerance that will get in the way of her success. One knock and she’s down for the count. If failures are avoided in high school, they will overwhelm her in university. University counsellors are seeing record numbers of anxious students who cannot cope with adversity. Here’s how parents can help: don’t smooth over the bumps in a child’s life. Psychologists use the term “over-parenting” to describe people who overprotect their children. The children have not experienced sufficient independence in decision-making and in facing the consequences of their sometimes misguided actions and choices. Not surprisingly, over-parented children have not practised all that lies at the heart of resilience: independent problem-solving, dealing with failure, facing tough choices, living through consequences and getting back on their feet by their own power. Resilience is not just a skill for students. Certainly, schools and teachers must continue to grow and change as well. As a community, our role is not just to prepare young people for the next test or grade, but also for life.

“ A girl who lacks faith in her ability to solve problems or overcome disappointments is going to avoid challenges and difficult conversations.

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TABLE OF CONTENTS | SPRING 2018 • TORCH 15